The Mega-Zine Museum
January 30, 2001
SECLUDED RAINBOW So, Bryan from Westlife got his girlfriend pregnant. That means they're breeding. NOOOOOOOO! It's too frightening to contemplate.
THE FIEND NEXT DOOR It's not Terry's, it's not WLW's, it's mine... OK? MINE! I think you'll find it IS mine!
THE VARYING OXYMORON The townies in my area hang around in posses, such as the CMS — Colshaw Mad Squad — and the HLC — Handforth Loony Crew. Need I say more? I think you said it all right there!
'ZINERS
If ever there is a 'Zine convention, I will be sat in a corner watching and laughing at you all arguing. Manics fans vs non-Manics fans, Broccoli vs Psychotic Broccoli.
I'm not a Manics fan either but I don't feel the need to insult their fans to prove I don't like their music.
WLW — this goes for you as well!
Silvan Draconis
My knuckles have been
WELL AND TRULY RAPPED!
FLUFFY
I love you so much that I customised some of the lyrics to a jolly good song for you:
Fluffy, Fluffy, Fluffy the bush kangaroo
Fluffy, Fluffy, Fluffy the bush kangaroo....
And — Oh the captain Fluff, lived in a tree...
(can't remember any more of that but I hope you are touched by my creations).
Kiss The Goose
Someone round here is 'touched' —
NOT SURE IT'S FLUFFY!
SOME LIGHT PROSE
Davord blinked. All around, people were prostrated before him, kneeling and chanting: "Hail, the Dark Lord!"
One, a young man, looked up. He coughed. Davord screeched in anger and his talons tore through those closest to him in an orgy of bloodlust.
A low moan echoed as Davord cut a swathe through the crowd until he was the only one left. Then he curled up in WLW's lap and was tickled affectionately.
Lonely Pine From The Forest Of Misery
Sounds like a typical Sunday
AT WLW TOWERS
TO INTRODUCE MYSELF
I need the assistance of a member of the studio audience. Yes sir — and your name is? Norbex? OK, walk down here on your hind legs and join me on stage.
Now, if you could hold up this card with an arrow on it. No, Norbex, make sure the arrow points at me! Right... Drum roll please...
Would everyone pay attention to centre stage, where you will see a guy with an arrow pointing at him. Well... that's me!
Odd Fozy
So it is!
HOW COME I NEVER GET PICKED? HUH?
WLW AND FELLOW COMPANIONS
Some uninteresting facts:
- Bats only fly left on exiting a cave.
- Every five seconds, a woman chooses a product from the Nivea range.
- My name backwards is NEAS.
- Cats don't like eating soap.
- If you cross a hamster with an exploding device, you get a mess.
The Reincarnated Squirrel Eater
Remember, kids... you are NOT to try out
NUMBERS 4 AND 5 JUST TO SEE, OK?
I DON'T KNOW WHY
But I'm going to stick up for Parsley Possum. He/she said a few things which have offended a few people (including me — a Manics fan), but he/she can also be funny sometimes. Parsley and Dark Grey Wolf are both popular 'Ziners but let's not argue with each other.
We all have to live here on p142, so we might as well be civil. Except to trendies, who are just asking for it in my opinion.
Small Luminous Kiwi Fruit
I agree — life's too short...
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE... YADDA YADDA...
HOWYA ENOLA!
I'm Irish too and I just wanna say it's about time someone put the record straight. I have a few things to add:
Ireland isn't "full of green fields", there is no such thing as a leprachaun and we don't all have red hair and green eyes!
The Fors@ken One
In my "Book Of Obvious Stereotypes",
p83, IT SAYS YOU ARE!
