The Mega-Zine Museum

November 19, 2000

HANDYMANEQUIN WLW — you are crazy, but what does WLW stand for? Why not call yourself Bob? Or John? 'Cos I might be a girlie for all you know — and Bob or John would be just plain silly!

NINJACOW Are they gone? Is it safe to come out? Thank God for that. This place has been overrun with trendies recently. I'm not sure it's safe yet.

INDIGESTION OF THE THIGH If you leave shampoo in your hair, does it make you look any different? I look more like Neil Buchanan now than I ever did. Uh?

WLW AND 'ZINER PEEPS

I thought my first letter should contain my nominations:

The Golden Lioness Of Arax

Most Mysterious? Interesting...

SEVERAL CANDIDATES THERE, I THINK!

DEAR EVERYONE

I need help with my TV. When it shows Teletext, all the letters are mixed up and wrong. I found that Plughole Fantasy read 'Lughole Fantasy' and Plastic Bag Tree read 'Elastic Hag Wree'.

I have an idea that may be because of the repeated viewing of Top Of The Pops. If this is so, I will have to keep my sister well away from the TV.

Sparkle

I typed them in like that... some days

I JUST CAN'T GET IT TOGETHER!

CHEESY FOETUS

If you take it at the basic scientific level, the meaning of human life is to procreate and pass your genes on to the next generation.

If anyone found out the true meaning of life, they would immediately cease to exist in this universe, as there wouldn't be any point in living anymore.

I believe that we will discover the meaning of life when we move on from this world to the next (or wherever we go after death).

SnowmanRobot

I shall be going to the Bahamas...

I INTEND TO DISCOVER IT IN THE SUN

HEY EVERYONE!

Even though this is my first message to the 'Zine, my best friend Berol, the pink fluffy bag, and I have been reading it for ages and we would just like to say that we ARE normal — aren't we Berol?

Anyhoo, whoever it was who mentioned Charvers — yes, they are the spawn of the devil. Actually, they're worse than that.

The Girl With The Glitter

Worse? You mean 'Spurs fans' worse?

OR NOT QUITE THAT BAD?

WLW

My li'l brother Scott thinks he knows you. He says you live in Durham and you are a daddy to five kids! One of whom is called Mickey!

Of course, my brother is an idiotic, Carling-drinking, moronic trendie with a brain the size of an underdeveloped piece of Blu-Tack, so I wouldn't pay any attention to him.

Fairy Cake

How is Scott? Long time no see!

AND MICKEY SAYS: "HI"

A TROUBLED SOUL

Dearest WLW. I have no life, I have no friends. I don't have any brothers or sisters and I am a bit of a loner.

I listen to old Kate Bush albums in the dark and watch all the soaps (just to make sure everyone else is as miserable as I am). The highlight of my sad little existence is 'Zine.

Am I normal? Anyone in the same hell?

Manics Depressive

Sounds horribly like MY life!

NOWT WRONG WITH SOAPS AND KATE BUSH

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