Mega-Zine
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April 2, 2000

CRUCIFIX KISS Top three most attractive men are: 1) Nicky Jones 2) Nicholas Allen Jones and 3) Nicky Wire. (I know they are the same person but you have to admit, Nicky IS God.) Is he? really?

GROUPIEGIRL Tomorrow shines through but I'm missing yesterdaaaaaay. What about today? Huh? Today's THE day I reckon.

ANAEMIC ANGEL Graham Coxon or Jonny Greenwood? Mr cool personified or Mr cool hairdo? I can't decide so I'll throw it open. Graham Norton (what? oh!)

 

WLW,

Would you take the time to answer a few simple questions? er... OK

  1. How long have you been doing this job? Since man invented the wheel
  2. Do you see yourself as an icon to a generation of alienated, teenage greebos? My friends are NOT greebos!
  3. What flavour icing attracts you to a doughnut? Raspberry or chocolate
  4. Where DO all the old 'Ziners end up? They live forever in my heart (?)

tHe woN hOo cuLdN't spel xxx

And the answer to that 5th question...

YOU ARE!

 

TO THE PEOPLE,

Welcome to this invitation to have my life. I'm not ungrateful but I think you'd have a better time. The reason is that, if I was someone else, by now I might be in control so remember:

  • Uniforms are tools.
  • If you think you're a human being, then you're one of them too.
  • The world turns seas around me.
  • In my veins tears cry their sorrow and in my vision you'll never find your love.
  • Take your society from us.

The Fist Of Rebellion

Not sure where we're going with this...

BUT DEEP? DEFINITELY!

 

WLW,

A few days ago somebody asked you who that rather disturbing creature was at the top of this page, all bug eyes, stringy hair and fiery tongue. You told them that it was Davord, Lord Of Tharg, and that he ate butterflies for fun.

Can he appear/disappear anywhere, anytime, whenever he likes? Only I had a very drunken night last night and could swear I saw him staring back at me in the bathroom mirror this morning!

Pink Mafia

Oh yes, he's all powerful...

HE KNOWS EVERYTHING YOU'RE UP TO!

 

TO ALL 'ZINERS,

Things you should never do:

  1. Tell townies/trendies you aren't exactly against fox-hunting.
  2. Tell townies/trendies you like Pokemon/Sonic or hate fashion.
  3. Drink tea/coffee after eating polos.
  4. Argue with townies that sheep are thick. They will get very upset. As if sheep understand English.
  5. Tell townies your dad makes you pluck turkeys at Christmas.

Hippie Inna Kimono

And get drunk in front of your mum,

NEVER DO THAT — BELIEVE ME!