The Mega-Zine Museum
August 4, 1998
MELLOW YELLOW David Hasselhoff says: "Don't shoot people in the face, kids." There's an obvious response to that. But I'm far too mature to make it!
AVERAGE TOAST FARMER It's hard to make friends if you keep pulling your lower lip over your head. Making the eye holes is the worst part, though.
NUTMEG If all else fails, remember that "love" is just an anagram of "vole". Or "evol", "velo", "ovel" etc.
DEAR VIEWERS
Why do lads punish themselves? They waste a fortune on designer labels, constantly fight for no reason, never express their feelings, go through the pain of pumping iron, pretend not to care about anything and idolise stupidity.
And to top it all off, they then date the most vain and shallow girls possible.
Lads, eh?
The Lotus Eater
Oh. Er... Hell hath no fury like maybe
A GIRL AFTER ALL SCORNED.
DEAR 'ZINE
The nerve! I was asked if I was a boy. Here are some reasons why:
- I don't wear itsy-bitsy clothes
- I'm not a designer label junky
- I own my own Playstation
- I don't come over all unnecessary at the mention of any given boy band
- My only make-up is nail varnish.
I'd rather be a blokish girl than an eyelash-fluttering girlie twerp!!
Oyuki the Pistol-Packing Game Girl.
Pistol-packing huh? You know what
DAVID HASSELHOFF SAYS...!
DEAR 'ZINE
I read that Addenbrooks Hospital is investigating the possible links between pigeon droppings and three recent deaths.
If there is a link, maybe the MOD could refine the potency of the droppings.
In the event of war we could train thousands of pigeons to fly over the enemy and bomb them to death.
Tripoli
Adds a whole new meaning to the term
FALL OUT.
TO MY BEST BUD
Claire likes Italians, Italians like Claire,
She's got brown eyes and mad ginger hair!
Always up for a night on the tiles,
She's a veggie obsessed with the X Files,
Intensely intelligent, available too,
Send me your details and she'll get back to you!
Happy birthday on the 14th!
Sleeping Jiva.
Sickly sweet verse from Sleeping Jiva.
SO MUCH SO IT'S MADE ME A HEAVER!
