The Mega-Zine Museum
January 3—4, 1997
BITCHY WITCHY says she is infatuated with Mark Lamarr like Midnight Princess and asks if Midnight would like to band with her to become the Lamarr Groupies?
SPEEDNIK wants to know if he is even remotely famous 'Zinewise? (Who's Speednik?)
DR STRANGE has felt disorientated ever since James Bond was screened on Boxing Day instead of Christmas Day. He says he is still unsure what day it is and has come out in a rather strange rash!
If only Dr Strange
WOULD GET A LIFE!
DEAR AFKA GONZO,
Here's my more realistic prediction for Leo:
LEO
Jupiter in your sign signifies that you'll go to a bank, attempt to jump one of those rope-things, and fall flat on your face. Everyone will laugh evily and you will run away to the tropical island of Guadeloupe. Oh yeah, Romance is really bad. Ha Ha Ha.
Scary Girl
It takes a certain kind of scariness
TO DEAL WITH GONZ, BUT IS THIS IT?
TWISTER GIRL,
Are you so naive you don't realise that people are different colours already?
And no, it's not cool.
It makes people subject to racist abuse, just because they have skin with differing pigment levels.
Wake up and smell the turkey!
Ironic Nomad
The problem today is that too many folk
ONLY SEE THINGS IN BLACK & WHITE
DEAR 'ZINE,
I'm confused.
Why is it Shirley Manson (Garbage) can wear a bright orange bubble jacket, without her band being called "Townie", but if I, a dedicated grundger (I like to think), wore one (not to say I would), none of my grundger mates would ever speak to me!
Basket Case
A more likely reason for them not speaking to you is because you spell
GRUNGER WITH A "D" IN THE MIDDLE!
DEAR 'ZINE
(This letter is printed word for word without my usual editing, WLW)
"Armed Robbers", Armed Police'... Why the word 'armed'? I mean, as if a robber will go into a bank looking for money, a fist fight or have to start calling the bank manager names. (What? WLW)
Also police are always armed, have you ever seen them going around calling terrorists "Stupid Silly Billies"?
AFKA Gonzo
I've read this five times and still haven't a clue what it means. Gonz, I'm
AFRAID YOU'VE REALLY LOST IT, MATE!
DEAR PROUD AND DEDICATED PA FAN,
Why don't you get some real taste and listen to something good like New Model Army?
Of course, you must be very uneducated about good music, like Peter Andre.
Twister Girl
Sorry Twis, but this letter is boring!
BE WARNED
'Ziners, as well as printing the best letters, now and then I am going to print absolute lemons. Public ridicule should keep you on your toes!
