The Mega-Zine Museum
November 30, 1996
BLACK FRANCIS has found Elvis. The King is living above BF's local launderette and is planning a tour of Hull's patisseries. Are there any patisseries in Hull?
THE LAIRY FAIRY'S claim to fame is that the brother of the lead singer in The Divine Comedy is marrying the daughter of TLF's English teacher. Got that?
THE INNOCUOUS SUPERCHRONIC has some food for thought: Imagination is the eye of the soul. (Joseph Joubert).
Does that mean if you have a fertile
IMAGINATION YOUR SOUL IS RICH?
DEAR GONZO (I'll drop your pretentious AFKA, OK?)
I'm sorry to disappoint you, but your Shakespeare shopping list was a cruel hoax. Luckily I have the real one.
Sum Hamlet cigares
Ay measure for ay measure of Timon (a herbe)
And fore the wyfe, well as you like it deare.
Broken Circles, the eternal plagiarist
What about a slice of Ham-let and some
FAIRY WASHING UP LIQUID?
THINGS THAT ROCK
- Waking up to a bright sunny morning.
- Big chunky high-heeled shoes.
- The majority of indie bands.
- Meeting someone famous and acting like it's no big deal.
- Knowing something no one else knows.
- 'Zine and WLW.
Dazy, Girl from Mars
And waking up early on a Saturday morn
THINKING IT'S FRIDAY AND REMEMBERING
DEAR 'ZINE
What do people see in Liam Gallagher? His brother Noel is the one who writes all the songs. Liam is a waster but gets all the fame. All he does is shake a tambourine and badmouth people, and he gets paid millions for it.
Oasis should dump him because he isn't talented, he is ungrateful and without Oasis where would he be now?
Because of his brother's talent he has hit it lucky and gets to go out with Patsy Kensit.
The Ziggurat
Is going out with that
FLIBBERTYGIBBET REALLY SO GREAT?
DEAR MEGA-ZINE
I hate Christmas.
If I go into hibernation now, can I avoid Santa stumbling drunkenly into my bedroom at 2am to shove chocolate coins into a pillowcase? Or is the nightmare inevitable?
Sheila, taking a bow
DEAR GIRL WITH THE ANORAK PANTS
The Loiner is most very certainly wrong.
The gardener in The Herbs was Bayleaf.
How do I know? I was there!
Parsley the Lion
Do we give a fig what the gardener's
NAME WAS? I DON'T THINK SO.