The Mega-Zine Museum
November 22, 1996
SAD PERSON says he has finally found Bamber Boozler's double. And would you believe it, it's Ron Dixon. Yes, that lovable soul from Brookie. Way-hey!
THE CRUSHED ORANGE has squashed Adonis' greatness: "Up my way, like, there's a building company called just that, Adonis." So Adonis, you're now just a vain lump of stone. Sorry...
THE SPINHEAD warns Schumacher's Perfect Smile and The McLaren F1 that Jacques Villeneuve shaved his head. He now looks dodgy. Just like a footballer.
The True Rod thinks The Girl Who Wants
THE MOON ON A STICK IS FAULTLESS!
THE MOST INCREDIBLE COINCIDENCE EVER!
Right. I needed a video to record something, so I picked one at random from my brother's collection. I played it to see what it contained and found a six-year-old A Question of Sport.
"Wouldn't it be totally amazing if Stuart Pearce was on this?" I thought. Lo and behold, there was Psycho on Bill Beaumont's team.
I was never so shocked in my whole life!
The Average Believer
Why shock? That guy is always on the
BOX THESE DAYS, NEVER IN IT!
DEAR 'ZINE
I want to say how brill' that untitled poem by Broken Circles was (Do you want to hide...). It really spoke to me.
If Broken Circles keeps up that sort of quality, then I'm going to have to start a fan club.
I've had one poem printed before (under a different name, of course), but I would love to be able to write like Broken Circles. It was sheer class!
Sheriff Buck, giving out due credit
C'mon Sheriff, you're breaking rules
YOU'RE REALLY BC IN DISGUISE!
DEAR THE NAMELESS ONE
The story you referred to isn't scary at all. The last man on Earth will be Walter Phelan, the associate professor of anthropology at Nathan University.
The being that knocked on the door is a Zan, and the last woman on Earth will be Grace Evans.
All animals, with the exception of 216 species (two of each), will be wiped out, so says Knock by Frederic Brown.
Anst the Man
What are you rattling on about
YOU MERE MORTAL?!
DEAR 'ZINE
My typical day begins with me getting up (you can't be serious?). I then have some food, read the 'Zine, go to school and proceed to get very bored.
I have some more food halfway through the day, get bored again and then go home. I devour some homework, have something else to eat, watch some dull TV and then go to bed.
Anyone else have a similar lifestyle?
The Wonderbird
WEIRD FACTS OF LIFE
- Shoe repair shops always cut keys.
- Trains always do emergency stops when I'm sitting on the toilet.
- GCSE papers always have BLANK PAGE written on empty pages. Wouldn't you think it was a bit obvious?
- Ties are just pointless bits of material that partially strangle me.
A No Namer
Weird fact of 'Zine. This is the last
PAGE TODAY. ISN'T LIFE HARD?
