The Mega-Zine Museum
March 13, 1996
SURLY HERMIT wants to ditch Eurovision and put Terry Wogan's musical muses out of work. 100 lines for you, bold boy!
MEG CREEP says there should be more letters pages on 'Zine. Then he might get a full letter printed. No chance!
VLADAMIR ILLYICH has fallen in love with Cadbury's Golden Crisp. His green chocolate choice saves the Penguins.
RED HOT CHILLI BANANA always has holes in his socks when trying on a new pair of shoes. Smelly business!
Genius 2000 reckons Iron Lion Antelope
IS AN ANAGRAM OF HIS NAME! YAWN...
ODE TO THE 'ZINE
I like the 'Zine
I wish it would be mine.
I think it's rather good
Like my Christmas pud.
I showed it to a chicken
He was rather smitten.
I showed it to a cow
She said wow!
All 'Zine writers should take a bow.
Graham the Tomato
DEAR TANYA'S DYNAMIC CHILD
I'm here to stick up for heavy metal. I love bands like Metallica and Slayer. The 13 metal gigs I've been to were totally amazing.
The bands don't stand there and just sing, they get all of the crowd involved. Also, the band members don't have big egos, unlike many others I could mention - Oasis for instance!
Master of Puppets
One of a bucketful of not very nice
LETTERS TO TANYA. POPULAR GIRL!
DEAR 'ZINE
This is a public warning: The fairies have escaped. Go and hide in your nearest bread bin.
I was about to cook them for Sunday lunch but they used their fairy magic to escape from the plant pot I kept them in.
What happens if they come back and cook my mum for revenge?
Please, someone stop them soon!
Blue Nun on the Run
BRILL' INVENTIONS
- Waterproof teabag: Can be re-used and never gets wet.
- Solar powered torch: Very bright when used in good sunlight. No batteries needed!
- Cold radiators: Great in summer.
Artist formerly known as Gonzo
Must be fun living in your house
CUPS OF WATER, NO LIGHT, NO HEAT!
THINGS TO DO INSTEAD OF REVISION
- Tidy your bedroom
- Talk on the phone about how little revision you've done
- Eat far too much
- Watch Gardener's World
- Read Mega-zine
Isabelle Ringing
