Mega-Zine
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January 10, 1996

ANONYMOUS FROM GRIMSBY wrote to us. But why was the letter posted in Dublin?

FEMALE VERSIONS OF WAYNE AND GARTH say that feathers, stars and everything glittery are in fashion. Great, the Gary Glitter look is cool again!

TATH AND BOB want to know the point of net curtains. They give cover when you are being nosey with the neighbours.

PINEAPPLE HEAD wants all sad cases who took photos of roadies changing drums for Blur to feel shame. Cue red faces!

Pity the poor developers who had

TO DEVELOP THE POINTLESS PHOTOS!

 

JOB REVIEW - ANTELOPE KEEPER

Mainly found in zoos, antelope keepers have to keep the public away from the dreaded beasts.

In essence, they risk their lives to feed the antelopes and then get paid measly sums of money.

Personally, I'd rather be confused.

Iron Lion Antelope, totally confused

 

DEAR 'ZINE

I have often written 95 after my name, be it on a wall, desk or book. It all started when I found a school book with someone's name and 63 written on it.

I was fascinated to think that man hadn't even walked on the moon when this was done.

I shall continue my duty. Kids in 30 years' time will feel the same as I do.

Ringo's Moptop, (ex-Britpop Jellytot)

 

BEWARE 'ZINE READERS!

We on Planet Big Brain have watched you Earth people for some time now, and we think your so-called popular music is complete drivel.

Listen, heavy metal rules! Long live Megadeath, Pantera, Slayer, etc...

Change your musical tastes now, or we will be forced to invade your planet in order to save our sanity. Don't say you haven't been warned!

Pink Dustbin, Minister for Music

Sorry, but unless bands tour Big Brain

YOU WILL NOT BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!

 

DEAR 'ZINE

I have realised that Finlay in Home and Away is the only person who can compete against Neighbours' Cody in a battle of bad dressers.

Why do Australian soaps subject us to such horror?

As for the music, the world throws a party when a new song appears on the background soundtrack.

Give us a break, Australia!

Little Miss Bug

 

DEAR 'ZINE

Savo, the best 'Zine writer for 95? Yeah, right, and Liam Gallagher will be doing a duet with Damon Albarn!

My choice for top 'Zine writer would have been myself, of course.

All right, I've only been on 'Zine once and it was just two lines crammed among several others, but it's quality not quantity that counts.

Death with a Pulse Rate

Quality does count, and we all can't

COMPETE WITH SAVO THE WORDSMITH!