The Mega-Zine Museum
August 16, 1995
MUPPET "All who hate Louise from Sleeper say I". Not I. She is a vision of beauty, an Aphrodite for the 90s.
RAPUNZLE, RAPUNZLE, Letdownyourhair wants to change the national anthem to the Um-Bungo song. I must admit, it's got a good beat.
LOST IN SPACE hasn't a clue who Oasis and Blur are, and doesn't really care.
DUMPTRUCK calls for a new sport - a cross between tennis and sumo wrestling called Sumo-Tennis. Brilliant name.
Can you imagine Andre Agassi playing?
HE MIGHT NEED A BIGGER RACQUET!
BECK - STEREOPATHETIC SOUL MANURE
This is the best and worst album ever made. Sweet, fluffy country songs rub shoulders with frighteningly heavy grunge and bizarre noises.
All this punctuated with surreal diary entries. The best track is Satan Gave Me A Taco (Which Made Me Really Sick).
A marvellous album, recommended to all stupid people and lunatics.
"Big" Shelf-Imperfectionist
Why isn't Beck bigger than he is?
AND WE'RE NOT TALKING HEIGHT HERE
DEAR MEGA-ZINE
Thought for the day:
America produces sitcoms like Friends, Ellen and Roseanne.
All England is capable of is Last Of The Summer Wine, Duty Free and Brighton Belles, none of which are funny.
Miami Maiden, Waiting for the Punchline
REPLY TO SLENDER BABE
Tank Girl's great? Are you kidding? I saw the film and I must say it was a waste of a train fare and good popcorn.
No real plot, a shoddy ending and awful editing. What a complete waste of time.
The only thing that kept it together was the malevolent Keslee, played by the awesome Malcolm McDowell.
Female Clockwork Orange, Somewhere In Time
A classic example of how NOT to do it
SOME COMICS INTO FILMS DON'T GO
DEAR 'ZINE
If you ever really think about what you're doing, sometimes it all gets really surreal.
I was walking in a supermarket and I found myself looking at a cereal packet - I mean, REALLY looking.
I couldn't stop laughing. It was so stupid and so REAL! I didn't sleep that night. The darkness was SO REAL!!
Red Dress, Red Nest
My advice would be not to think
IT AVOIDS ANY COMPLICATIONS
MY QUESTIONS FOR THE WORLD
- Why won't people sit next to me on the buses and trains?
- If I smile at everyone, I get shouted at. If I don't, nobody comes near me. And those that do say "Oooh! What's wrong with you then, grumpy?!".
- Where can I go to meet people like me who have lives outside the pub and the park every week night, and some stupid club at weekends?
Sad, But True
