The Mega-Zine Museum
July 10, 1995
14-YEAR-OLD FEMINIST has hairy legs! And knows other girls have them too! And why do we need to know this?
PSYCHOTIC PENGUIN is largely in favour of space travel - honey, I get the feeling you've already gone there.
THE CLOUD CUCKOO wants us to buy Stars by Dubstar - who are not overhyped - yet! So you better get it now.
ALICE IN OBLIVION wants to have a moan 'cos her Mum won't let her go to one more concert - she's going to three!
Lipbalm Queen asks for any info about
TIM HENNMAN - GET DIGGING
DEAR 'ZINE
Why, oh why do so many girls stay with boyfriends that mistreat them? I have a friend who is verbally abused and forever having her confidence knocked by her idiot of a boyfriend.
Yet she stays with him because she thinks she couldn't find anyone else.
Get a life girls, all of you must believe in yourselves and get out before the problem takes control of you.
The Disturbance at the Heron House
What has the 'zine scene got to say
ABOUT THIS GIRL/BOY TWIST?
CALL OFF THE SEARCH PARTY!
Yes, Cheesney Hawkes's disappearance is no longer a mystery, It has been revealed that whilst flexing his cheeky smile in preparation for his third comeback his mole exploded.
Three people were killed (including himself) and dozens were injured.
The remains of said mole is in the top right hand corner of your screen.
Easy Peasey!
The Insatiable One, Fascination Street
WHO SHOT MR BURNS?
It wasn't Maggie as she was strapped in the car. Principal Skinner is guilty because:
- The school basement was full of spades. He used one of these to dig up the gun from the Simpson's garden.
- He left his mother in the Town Hall. Would you take your mother if you were about to murder someone?
- And he is missing when they gather around Burns.
Sideshow Dan
We are honoured to behold the genius
SON OF JESSICA FLETCHER
DEAR MEGA-ZINE
The cover version of The Cranberries' Zombie is a load of techno pap. The song was written about the terrors of war and the scars it leaves.
It was meant to go along to a moving, angry tune, not one which sounds like someone went mad with their microwave.
The singing was worse than the first version, in that they shoved more cats down her throat. But whose cats?
Jarvis Cocker's Night Shirt
What is the worst cover you have
EVER HEARD? - NAME THAT DROSS
COMPUTERIZED LIFE
Everyone will have a computer,
that is what they say.
But computers can be degrading,
in more than just one way.
Computers replace workers,
which I feel is bad.
Because if I was replaced by a PC,
I would feel quite sad.
Computers will control the post,
And the shops and also TV.
But going out won't be the same
on Virtual Reality.
Robert Graff, The Bloke
