The Mega-Zine Museum
February 24, 1995
ANGRY LETTER
Am I the only one who doesn't like Anastasia Black and Lucille Le Dark?
Why are they on EVERY DAY? Why is there someone praising them every day?
Why isn't anyone buying Adam Ant's new single?
Calia, Stressed up.
General rubbishness perhaps?
OLD HAT CITY?!!!
PROGRAMME REVIEW - TOP OF THE POPS
A "brand new look" they promised. Like, yeah right. So they've got a new theme tune (all of five seconds worth) and some fancy graphics, but that's all.
The "music" played is still bland dance pap or teeny boy bands, which the teeny bopper audience loves to scream at.
And they can't even mime properly. It's back to the drawing board methinks.
The Cecile Hater, Pinguland.
But where else can you see Elton?
AND THEN THERE'S PHIL TO ENJOY!
TEN GOOD RECORDS IN MY DAD'S COLLECTION
| 1 | Hi Ho Silver Lining | Jeff Beck |
| 2 | Free Bird | Lynyrd Skynyrd |
| 3 | Soundhouse Tapes | Iron Maiden |
| 4 | Leader Of The Gang | Gary Glitter |
| 5 | Purple Haze | Jimi Hendrix |
| 6 | Dance with the Devil | Cozy Powell |
| 7 | Whole Lotta Rosie | AC/DC |
| 8 | Iron Man | Ozzy Osbourne |
| 9 | Smoke On The Water | Deep Purple |
| 10 | Jailbreak | AC/DC |
Shutty and Ricky, Bradford
Ah! The Good Ol' Days - what memories!
LIMERICKS ABOUT ERIC CANTONA
There was a young thug from Marseille,
Whose antics upset the FA.
They decreed that he oughta
Not kick a supporter,
He's banned from now till Doomsday
There was a young thug from Marseille,
Who when drinking rough 'Vin de Pays',
Said "Je up Kung Fu',
To take quitting Man U",
And at Selhurst called it a day.
Shutty and Ricky, Bradford.
So good they HAD to go on today
BUT DON'T GET ON HIS BAD SIDE!
6 FACTS THAT AIN'T DEBATABLE
- Dracula - the greatest book I've read
- The X-files are brill
- David Duchovny is gorgeous
- Smashing Pumpkins are ace
- WLW is actually Paula Yates
- Damon Albarn doesn't look like Rodney Trotter, OK?
Joanna, All by herself, Magic America
Paula Yates!!! Advice - if you want
TO GET ON - DON'T BE RUDE!
TOP TEN "MAN'S MEN"
- Gene Vincent
- Jack Reagan (John Thaw, The Sweeney)
- Steve McQueen
- Dick Turpin
- George Best
- Ted Roach (used to be in The Bill)
- Jerry Lee Lewis
- Bernard Manning
- Sid James
- Leslie Grantham (Dirty Den)
Dick Turpin, Condemned Cell, York Gaol
Grant and Phil, Don Brennan, Wolf.
WHAT A BEVY OF BEAUTIES - NOT!!!
ODE TO 'ZINE
Wandering through the darkness,
Perspiration breaks out on my forehead.
Looming figures before me.
Mouth grows dry, tongue turns to dust.
I need guidance, and I need light.
Just when I think life's over for me
I turn to page 443.
Then everything's all right because the 'Zine loves me.
From a Rose in the Hospital.
Your missives may be tampered with
SOUNDS LIKE YOU NEED GLASSES MATE
