Mega-Zine
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January 11, 1994

TOP TEN PEOPLE WHO WON'T MAKE #1

  1. East 17
  2. Bad Boys Inc
  3. Manic Street Preachers
  4. Worlds Apart
  5. Mr Blobby (again!)
  6. Stone Roses
  7. The Lemonheads
  8. Let Loose
  9. Sean Maguire
  10. St Etienne

Mark Owen's Babe, Heaven

Heaven? More like purgatory, surely!!!

 

BOOK REVIEW: BLISS by PETER CAREY

AMAZING! The lead character dies before the book starts and dies twice again before it ends.

Carey mixes city bores with wild frenzied folk and shows how they clash and sometimes mingle. You'll be dragged into all 300 pages.

And by the way, Crowded House's Locked Out was based on this.

Read it and weep.

Tammy Baker, Kare Kare

Have you got a lot on your plate, Tam?

IT'S BLISS TO BE SEEN ON THE 'ZINE!

 

BONO

Bono what can I say?
Your gorgeous voice
Makes my day

Your song words bring me to tears
You are different
From the usual drear

I wish I could see you live
I hope my wish comes true soon
'Cos I'm empty inside
If I don't have you

Emotional Bono Fan, Planet Zooropa

Nice one, EBF! More poems... PLEASE!

 

DEAR MEGA-ZINE

In response to DJ DNA - you make me feel sick.

Mega-zine would be excellent if it wasn't for invertebrates like you. I'm fed up with people slagging off TT and Julian Clary.

It's none of anyone's business, so keep it to yourself and shut your face.

K18, Northern Ireland

PS You'll find "invertebrates" in the dictionary - 'Nuff said.

But surely it's EVERYONE's business!?

 

DEAR 'ZINE

I feel I have to say this and rest in peace - Manic Street Preachers are zero. What kind of idiot carves "4 REAL" into his arm live on stage?

And when there's a rumour that Michael Stipe has Aids, the same pillock tells us he DESERVES to have it.

He says, "When I sit in my room with a book and a bottle of vodka, I do it 'cos I'm SAD not 'cos it's cool". So apt.

Pseudonym, Birmingham

Too right! He sounds like a HUGE wal!!!

 

DEAR MEGA-ZINE

We want to make 1994 a clean, correct year.

Thus, we feel the Spin Doctors should be banned (along with their "diverse" music). They encourage people to unbalance and hurt medical professionals. This should be stopped.

We say they change their name to Are You Sitting Comfortably, General Practitioner?

Two Trees, The Wood

AAAAHHH-HAAAA! Top comedy jokesters!!!