Mega-Zine
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November 24, 1993

ODE TO TAKE THAT FANS

I don't mean to insult you
It's not your fault you're dumb
Advice - to take your TT tapes
And stick them up your...
Local charity shop

Trowel off that make-up
Stop looking down your nose
At goths and grunge and indie fans
Who don't wear tarty clothes
Like you

Billy Corgan's Pistachio Ice-cream

Ooo-er. Controversial ode!

 

TOP TEN MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN

  1. Kate Bush
  2. Demi Moore
  3. Michelle Pfeiffer
  4. Cindy Crawford
  5. Patsy Kensit
  6. Sharon Stone
  7. Marilyn Monroe
  8. Jet (Gladiators)
  9. Geena Davis
  10. Claudia Schiffer

King of Clubs, Lurpack

 

DEAR MEGA-ZINE,

I also agree with the cynical Alternative Andy that Newman and Baddiel shouldn't just be liked for their looks.

I get annoyed when I hear girls talking about how sexy Rob looked in a certain sketch. I admit to finding both of them sexy, but I can also appreciate their undeniable talent for comedy which is at its peak in their current tour.

A Newman and Baddiel Fan, Bristol

So, girls - you've all been told!

 

TOP TEN SMITHS SONGS

  1. The Boy With The Thorn In His Side
  2. Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
  3. The Hand That Rocks The Cradle
  4. What Difference Does It Make?
  5. Shoplifters Of The World Unite
  6. Cemetery Gates
  7. There Is A Light That Never Goes Out
  8. Still Ill
  9. How Soon Is Now?
  10. I Know It's Over

Handsome Devil Seeks Girl Afraid

The old ones are always the best!

 

A REPLY TO MR SHANKLY

I too, love The Smiths, but there were a few errors in your letter:

  1. The Manics DID NOT sound like Guns N'Roses
  2. When you use the word "indie" in a derogatory sense, you're insulting yourself - The Smiths were on Rough Trade (an indie) and the Manics are on Columbia/Sony (a major)
  3. The Manics haven't sold out - they NEVER had any principles!

Sarah Bradley, Wakefield

Well, that's told you QUITE frankly!

 

ALBUM REVIEW: EVEN COWGIRLS GET THE BLUES by k.d. lang

This, k.d.'s sixth album, also happens to be the new Gus Van Sant film of the same name.

Early k.d. fans are treated to Don't Be A Lemming Polka - a live favourite from k.d.'s Recliner days.

Other highlights are Hush Sweet Lover, Lifted By Love, Virtual Vortex and Cowgirl Pride.

Matt Parkinson, Consort, Alberta

Even 'ziners get the blues - write in!